Grace and Beauty in Nepal

A few days ago I returned from Nepal. Kathmandu far exceeded my expectations. Sometimes going to a new city with no expectations is a good thing. It leaves you open to embrace new perspectives, untainted by guidebooks written by foreigners. The greatest joy was the people, their history and their way of live. Yes, the city was chaotic. The roads were filled with pot holes. There were frequent power failures and blackouts. But these are easy distractions. One needs to be able to look beyond this to the essence of the place and its people.

The Nepalese were eager to ensure that as visitors I had a good time. They often enquired whether I was enjoying my stay and if I could come back to visit again. This is the essence of true hospitality. The genuine concern for a visitor's well being and happiness. The deep desire for the Nepalese to ensure that we visitors leave their country with great memories was touching.

Today international travel has become casual, impersonal and transactional. With the proliferation of internet travel sites, budget airlines and a large business travel segment, alot of the romance in travel seems to be lost. The hotel staff in many countries don't seem to have time to linger and chat with you or enquire about your well being. If they did, it would be in a highly scripted fashion and as part of their job description towards "client satisfaction." As a business traveller I often tend to be equally abrupt as I am anxious to get things "done." However, the Nepalese transported me to a time where civility and graciousness matters. They were impeccable hosts - they treated me like a revered guest in their home. And I reciprocated by slowing down and smiling from my heart.

My time in Nepal reminded me that hospitality is such an integral part of Asian culture - where Guest is God. Tips are received with gratitude not with an attitude (as in the US). At my friend's golf club we had wanted to go for a walk and I was in heels. One of the staff took off her sandals and told me to wear them on the walk. It was a spontaneous and a simple gesture of taking care of one's guest. It struck me as a reflection and extension of the Nepali's people's culture, spiritual values and inherent warmth.

Of course there were a few local Nepalese who were ashamed of their "backward" country, culture and people. They were anxious to get onto the Western bandwangon and become "modern." One of them told me how about certain barbaric temple rituals that were performed during the upcoming Navarathri. For a country teaming with NGOs and pockets of fly by night expats who prescribe all sorts of western medicine to tackle all sorts of local problems in Nepal - being caught between cultures can be a tough and very confusing thing. One could easily lose their cultural and spiritual anchor in the midst of incessant talk about economic "progress." But for me it has also reminded me to dig deeper to defend the symbolism inherent in many ancient rituals. And to look beneath the surface for truths that inform people's choices and way of life.

The Nepalese struck me as strong and proud people who had deep respect for their majestic Himalaya, their great Gurkka regiment and their beautiful stupas and temples filled with ornate handcarvings. A few of the Nepali elite I met were sophisticated, clear headed and visionary. They saw not only the potential in their country but also its problems. They were not impressed with the Westerners or their simple "upgrade" ideology. A few Sherpas who has scaled Mount Everest and were incredibly well travelled also shared some keen insights with us. They talked about the essential difference between the Western climbers and the Sherpas. And how as Sherpas he only enjoyed climbers who climbed with a heart and with a love for the mountain. As opposed to personal glory which they said often seem to inspire Western climbing expeditions.

A colleaague of mine pointed out the people here although poor had a quiet sense of dignity. They were not anxious to impress or to exploit the tourists. They wanted to share their history, culture and identity. And they did so with simple joy and a sense of ownership. It reminded me of my time in rural South India where even the taxi drivers were incredibly poetic and deeply knowledgeable about every tree, river and roadside store and its history and mythology. So this trip once again reminded me that the world is a rich and complex place. And if I traveled with the right spirit and remained alert to the nuances of a place and its people, I will be richly rewarded.